I will remember the years 2000-2009 as my most difficult decade.
In contrast to Shane, whose post inspired this one, I started the decade on top of the world. It was an odd place to find yourself at the age of 28. While Shane was a pauper in the world of the ultra-rich, I was one of the upper class. At one point in the 90's I remember looking around and thinking "I can't believe all this is happening."
Thank you internet boom. I was fortunate to catch the wave early and bail out before it crashed. By the end of the 90's I had it all figured out. And I couldn't understand why everyone else was so stupid to not follow my lead.
That was my mistake.
If success ever went to someone's head, I was that man. I threw away all the attributes that made me successful and replaced them with the worst traits imaginable. Self-righteous, arrogant and haughty. I was unbearable even to myself.
Looking over the timeline; it doesn't look so bad. Sort of like viewing Katrina damage from an airplane flyover. I got married (2000), sold a house and moved (2001), climbed Mount Rainier (2004), rowed in the Head of the Charles (2005), climbed Mount Kilimanjaro (2006), had my first child (2007) and bought a house, moved and got a new job (2009).
But between all that, there was a terrific amount of pain. I spent a lot the past decade figuring out what to do with the rest of my life. When all roads are open, it's tough to choose just one.
And I don't mention this often but between the years 2004-2007 Emily and I had significant marital problems. Looking back, we were a hair-trigger away from divorce. We're better now but that's the part of this past decade I gloss over. You just hear the good stuff. There's a lot I don't tell you and I never will.
One of the things I've learned is while you cannot control events, you can control your reaction to them. Looking at things dispassionately can be a good way to be. Looking at the world rationally allows you to make good decisions and think long-term.
My new philosophy is best summed up with the saying "Seek first to understand and then to be understood." A lot of people, like myself, screw up and make the latter more important than the former. Take it from me, you wind up looking dumb.
It may sound trite but people who are dealt a bad hand learn valuable skills. The mistakes I made in the previous decade, I won't make them again. And they didn't break me, they made me much wiser and stronger.
So here's to a new decade. May it be more prosperous and good to us all.
In contrast to Shane, whose post inspired this one, I started the decade on top of the world. It was an odd place to find yourself at the age of 28. While Shane was a pauper in the world of the ultra-rich, I was one of the upper class. At one point in the 90's I remember looking around and thinking "I can't believe all this is happening."
Thank you internet boom. I was fortunate to catch the wave early and bail out before it crashed. By the end of the 90's I had it all figured out. And I couldn't understand why everyone else was so stupid to not follow my lead.
That was my mistake.
If success ever went to someone's head, I was that man. I threw away all the attributes that made me successful and replaced them with the worst traits imaginable. Self-righteous, arrogant and haughty. I was unbearable even to myself.
Looking over the timeline; it doesn't look so bad. Sort of like viewing Katrina damage from an airplane flyover. I got married (2000), sold a house and moved (2001), climbed Mount Rainier (2004), rowed in the Head of the Charles (2005), climbed Mount Kilimanjaro (2006), had my first child (2007) and bought a house, moved and got a new job (2009).
But between all that, there was a terrific amount of pain. I spent a lot the past decade figuring out what to do with the rest of my life. When all roads are open, it's tough to choose just one.
And I don't mention this often but between the years 2004-2007 Emily and I had significant marital problems. Looking back, we were a hair-trigger away from divorce. We're better now but that's the part of this past decade I gloss over. You just hear the good stuff. There's a lot I don't tell you and I never will.
One of the things I've learned is while you cannot control events, you can control your reaction to them. Looking at things dispassionately can be a good way to be. Looking at the world rationally allows you to make good decisions and think long-term.
My new philosophy is best summed up with the saying "Seek first to understand and then to be understood." A lot of people, like myself, screw up and make the latter more important than the former. Take it from me, you wind up looking dumb.
It may sound trite but people who are dealt a bad hand learn valuable skills. The mistakes I made in the previous decade, I won't make them again. And they didn't break me, they made me much wiser and stronger.
So here's to a new decade. May it be more prosperous and good to us all.
Mistakes are part of the journey. I doubt I'll ever stop making them. I think without mistakes, there is no growth.
Posted by: shane | February 01, 2010 at 08:22 AM
True enough, I just wish they weren't so painful.
Posted by: Dave G | February 01, 2010 at 12:21 PM
Wasn't this the decade that you bought all that stock in Segway?
Ha!
What a colossal mistake!!
Posted by: brian | February 10, 2010 at 12:41 PM
Reward excellent failure. Punish mediocre success.
Posted by: brian | February 10, 2010 at 12:43 PM
B - that's a good one, I like that. "Have the courage to fail" was another I saw online that I liked.
Posted by: Dave G | February 12, 2010 at 11:58 AM